Friday, August 9, 2013

Change & The Thing That Holds Us Back

We all know what's good for us.  We know intuitively what changes we can make to improve ourselves and our situations to find more satisfaction and joy in life.  

change jobs
leave the relationship
alter weight and/or improve health
move away from or move closer to someone
seek counseling or professional advice
let go of bitterness

Changing is difficult because fear is easy.  The greatest fear is to really look inside and understand ourselves because we fear what we will find.  We’re afraid to confront our weakness and unresolved issues.  We’re afraid of uncovering the hurts and really understanding our disappointments and disillusionment and dissatisfaction.  We think we can avoid pain by ignoring it.   


We’re afraid that we’re not good enough or worthy of something better, so we disguise our fear and rename it.  We cover it up with deceptive thoughts and behaviors and addictions that dull our pain in an attempt to avoid it.  In reality, those things only add to our pain and increase our fears.

Ignoring the inherent sufferings of life and trying to avoid them does not make them go away.   Guarding your vulnerable self doesn’t make you stronger.  It makes you more fragile and less resilient.  It makes you brittle, less able to cope, and less able to achieve happiness and satisfaction and fulfillment in life.  The only way to save yourself is to open up to your fears and look them straight in the face.  You are good enough.  You are worthy of healing, forgiveness, redemption, joy.  The goodness of life is available if you strive to understand your fear in order to make the changes you know you want. 

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